Me and my older sister wanted to go somewhere for a week, but we were booking it with short notice and small budgets. So of course, all-inclusive Mexico was the perfect choice, since all that swine flu hype has certainly helped drop vacation prices. I don’t get the flu craze anyway: poor Mexico is suffering, so is the tourism industry in general, and even the pork meat industry is reporting declines in sales because of the politically incorrect name. I heard a statistic somewhere that you are more likely to get hit by a car in Mexico than get the swine flu, and though I cant provide a reference, trying to cross streets in Puerto Vallarta gives me faith its true.

Kristjana and I eating dinner by the pool

After our family members repeatedly warned us not to touch or eat anything mexican (obviously impossible) and avoid all sick people, we left for the Hacienda Resort & Spa, and ate and drank our moneys worth for 7 days straight. While my sister never drinks alcohol, she decided to “sample” all of my fancy cocktails (which all tasted the same: sugary, limey and alcoholic), and once one of the bartenders, Alfonzo, found out about her sobriety, he wooed her with a specialty coffee (coffee, Kahlua and rum) that he made for her almost every night. Kristjana, my most conservative family member, also shocked me one day when we were walking home from the beach; she decided to do the walk in her bikini, justified by the fact that the construction workers enroute “have been working all day and deserved a show. Besides, they whistle, so I know I look good!”

We did nothing all day but laze around, only deciding between poolside or oceanside, and both were so warm that they were more comparable to a cool hottub than a hot pool. We didnt even have to move to shop, since the sellers walked from beach chair to beach chair selling everything imaginable, the most impressive being a live, 3 foot iguana. Two other Canadian girls were entertaining to watch since they baught something from every single one of them, with 2 or 3 surrounding them at once at any given time.  It was so warm every day that I managed to sweat off everything I drank (plus some), but somehow I still managed to break 3 of the chairs built for extremeley overweight north american tourists?!

While I always criticize packaged vacations and much prefer the thrill of backpacking and hostelling, once in a while its nice to be that spoiled tourist living out of an airconditioned hotel room and not worrying about enjoying anything but the great weather.