Tourism of my body

(disclaimer: this whole blog seems a tad inappropriate for some reason, but I can´t quite put my finger on it to tell the stories differently so excuse any unintended raciness)

I´ve spent a lot of time in the last 2 months exploring my body, learning about all the ways it works and breaks. In January I had the New Year´s resolution to be more flexible and to learn how to do a handstand, so through yoga and other excercises I´ve been trying to accomplish both.

Going to India in February was inspiring for my yoga hobby, and I discovered ayurvedic massage.  Its supposed to do wonders for your body and well-being, and I´m sure it does when done correctly, but its also created the perfect tourist trap for any entrepreneur who has a massage table, some oil, and two hands. I woke up one morning after a 10-hour overnight train ride and discovered the hard way how uncomfortable third class beds are; my upper back was all out of wack so I paid the $9 it cost for a 30 minute “authentic massage,” but it ended up being a wooden table, laminated with that plasticy kitchen counter stuff, a moldy pillow, and cooking oil lathered all over me by a hefty little Indian woman in the back of her shop shack. Needless to say it didnt help much, but when I got to Canada a few weeks later I saw a massage therapist, a chriporactor, and a Chinese/Japanese homeopath all for the first time.

The homeopath walked me through a series of excercises I should do to correct my over-arched lower back (too many years of horse backriding makes me stick my ass out and chest up in a very latina way), said I may have mild scoliosis, and taught me my right leg is slightly crooked from my hip joint being “unsettled.” Then he stuck a bunch of needles in my back for my first acupuncture treatment, which wasn´t that painful except for the fact I had gotten both my left side wisdom teeth pulled that morning and I couldn´t think about anything else.

Then I saw a chiropractor who got me butt naked to look at my spine and said I didn´t have any abnormal curvature, but that I did have flat feet and would need orthodics for a cool $700. Then he cracked me all over, including my pelvis to make my right hip straight, before taking my feet prints for my new orthodics.

The massage therapist was a big English guy who taught me I had tight hamstrings since I couldn´t touch the back of my legs to the bed when laying on my back. He taught me excercies to fix that, and then suggested I sleep with my feet tied together to keep my pelvis straight. The massage he gave me was actually the most wonderful release of tension in my lower back and around my neck, and I felt noticeably better when leaving his office instead of bruised and battered.

I´ve got my new orthodics in my favourite shoes now and hopefully something good is going on in the inner workings of my ageing body… although I don´t notice any $700 differences. Getting an ergonomic desk set up was one thing they all told me to do, as well as have lumbar support when I´m sitting or driving for long periods. Sadly most of my sitting for long periods occurs infront of a piano or my laptop and I´m not sure how to make them more comfortable. I learned I shouldn´t sit cross legged since itll make my right leg crooked again, carry heavy bags on my back, or sit on horses or stand in dance posture because its bad for my lower back, but unfortunately, I dont think giving up my favourite yoga pose, backpacking, riding, or dancing is going to happen anytime soon… but I have learned a lot about my body and perhaps when I´m old and broken one day I´ll atleast know why and how to fix it 🙂

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One thought on “Tourism of my body

  1. Hiya,
    I trust that all is well in SA. Where are the pics from Guyana?

    Cheers!

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